Yes, I have a pulse. I have just been too busy to breathe lately. But I don't want to risk my diary being closed for inactivity, so I will present to you a more of my twisted thinking. My second ever entry was a long list of wordplay. So here are some more to add to that list.

I wish I could get a job as an insecurity guard at the mall.

I wish teachers would give out homeless work.

I wish I had a key to a dangerous deposit box.

I wish you would take me dancing to small band music.

I wish the street had animal whole covers.

I wish I could grow up to be a silence show host.

I wish I had a theme park: the most melancholy place on Earth.

I wish I had a hysterically laughing willow tree.

I wish they had a Psycho Day party.

I wish I had a birthday hat to match my birthday suit.

I wish I could stay in the divorcee suite.

I wish I could swim in my carpool.

I wish I could be a bile donor.

Yeah, I wrote those in college, and just found them in the nether regions of my hard drive. I finally decided to convert all my old Textra files to word. How many of you actually remember Textra? Believe it or not, I was using it as recently as four years ago.

But then, I also am the one who didn't start buying CD's until the late 90s.

-CRbE