AAAARRRRRGGGGHHHHHHH!!!!

This is not working.

I am out there dating often.

I've been in a relationship.

I smack myself on the head and tell myself it will never happen.

It's been more than a year now.

It's been more than six months since I told him.

It hit me yesterday that I'm in love with him. Not a crush. Not those elusive 'feelings', but actual love. I thought I had gotten better. Every time I think it's gone, it gets stronger. When I told him back in July, I promised I wouldn't bring it up again. I mean, if he felt even the slightest bit in the same way, he'd say something, right? All I'd accomplish by bringing it up again is straining our friendship.

Some advice would be appreciated.