I started out the day feeling somewhat balanced. Really, I did. It's been six years now. That's 20% of my life. I was ok. Then I checked my email.

I got a letter from my prodigal ex-mother in law.

I thought I was over all that shit too. I think any other day I could have handled it. She just wanted me to know that she is thinking about me today, and she hopes I am well. It's a nice sentiment, really it is. It just threw off my balance.

I guess I need to keep this in perspective. I talked to my mom's cousin who I'll call Lana today. She had a really rough time. She was told she 'probably' had lupus. Turns out it's just psoryasis (I won't even try to spell that). Now, some background here is that this woman has constant health issues, and most of them highly unusual symptoms. But still.

I still wonder if this day can ever be normal for me. I haven't been upset necessarily, I've just been feeling off kilter since getting that email from Ramona. I think all it did was remind me what today is.

-CRbE