I'm back. Miss me? I know you did.

I just spent an amazingly relaxful weekend in the Santa Cruz mountains. And yesterday, I realized how much I've changed over the last few months.

I'm not an uptight control freak anymore.

That was such a huge part of who I was, and was probably my largest impediment. It's gone. Well, not gone, but certainly shrunk to about golf ball size. I can hear it squeaking, but can pretty much ignore it.

And I'm ditching the stupid initial thing. I'm losing track of who everyone is. If you actually know any of these people, please have the decency to protect their privacy.

Yeah

Basically everything in my life is uncertain right now. I may or may not have my dream job waiting for me, and the people who get to decide keep postponing their meeting. Six months ago, my head would have exploded. Now, I go about my days without too much worry.

I have no idea how I'm going to support myself living where I'm living. I may have to move this winter. I don't know where, and I'm not really thinking about it. I'll cross that bridge when I come to it.

And here's the hardest one to let slide. I really like Will (see, name, not initial). We've had two dates, and I want a third. I'm waiting for him to call me. If I haven't heard from him in a few more days, then I'll call him, but I'm not counting down the minutes until I can do so. You can't be a control freak and be at this stage of whatever it is.

I shared my little insight with my friends. Rob said I am becoming like him. Not such a bad deal. He is definitly someone who lives life to it's fullest.

-CRbE