Yes, I am still here.

There is a very fine line between being focused and goal oriented and having tunnel vision. Let me explain. When I was about 11 or 12, I decided I wanted to be a therapist when I grew up. From that point forward, everything I did pointed at that eventual goal. Other career paths never entered my mind.

Well, now I'm a therapist. 27 years old and life time goal accomplished. Not only am I wondering what now, but I am also questioning whether or not this is really the field for me. I know I'm good. That's not the problem. I have people who have been doing this longer than I've been alive who ask me for my input on their work. The program at the high school I work for has greatly increased its size and reputation since I've been on board. But still.

By the time three o clock rolls around, I am mentally and emotionally exhausted. I come home and veg. I thought that by working in a school where I got out so early, I'd have time to really have a life outside of work. I have that time, but not that energy. How am I possibly going to do this when I have a family? I need emotional energy at the end of my day.

The thing is, I never even considered what other possibilities are out there. I can't think of anything else I'd rather be. So far, the best I've come up with is Travel Agent. I plan all kinds of cool trips for my husband and myself, a few complete with itineraries. But with online ticketing and reservation services (what I use), how much are humans still needed. Also, I will be envious of every cool trip I plan for somebody else.

Teaching would be nice, but how long would it take me to burn out. Plus this young generation is so rude to adults. I like being the counselor because I'm the cool one to whom they can complain about their teachers. Also, if they are truely obnoxious, I can say they are inappropriate for group and suspend them until they can regulate themselves a bit better. Plus, I was such a horrible student in middle and high school that I would feel like such a hypocrite trying to inspire them to do better. I know I could do the whole learn from my mistakes bit, but in a teen's eyes? Get real. And I don't want to go younger than adolescence. I don't want to have to help them go potty or anything.

I'll figure it out eventually.

-CRbE