Well, I'm back safe and sound. It was nice to sleep in my own bed. I start back to work on Monday.

I have so many conflicting thoughts and feelings right now that it is difficult to put them to words. I was 17 during the gulf war and I was so sure about every thought I had. I was also secure that it was all happening on the other side of the earth. I was worried for Israel, and I was worried for the troops, but it never occured to me that I would ever worry this way about myself or my own loved ones. My cousin's husband is still missing. One of my good friends works for one of the companies on an upper floor in the trade center (my friend, thankfully, works in their Phoenix office). And many of the kids I have worked with during the last two years are now enlisted in the military.

Flying home yesterday was a surreal experience. I don't remember seeing that many soliers and armed guards in one place ever, even when I flew into Tel Aviv. And these were in Honolulu. I was somewhat comforted by the obvious fact that I was not near any real targets, but I think these people, if you can even call them that, are too smart to try something again right away. It could be years until the next thing. So much of it is dependent on the element of suprize.

I have never hoped that the United States would go to war. Not with Iraq, not with Bosnia, never. But now I think we need to. I know there will always be terrorists, and that these things will happen from time to time, but I think we need to at least exhaust their fundings. India and Pakistan have nuclear capabilities. It is not beyond reason to think that these people could get their hands on that technology as well. If we bankrupt them, that will help us defend against that.

-CRbE